Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Guys Say the Darnedest Things

So this guy makes me dinner and we're sitting outside afterwards enjoying a bottle of wine.

He leans in close like he's going to kiss me and, instead, says, "You know you're not pretty; your nose is too big. But you're nice and you're sexy as hell."

Let's just say we didn't kiss.

Or have another date, but there were other reasons for that.

That happened to me back in 2002, but it's still one of my favorite stories to share because it's hysterical.

I have no idea why he chose that moment, only inches from my face, to share his opinion, but he was certainly entitled to it.

So I was sharing that anecdote with a friend (a guy, of course) just a few weeks ago and he was appalled at the ignorance/arrogance of what the first guy had said.

He laughed about the stupidity of a guy being so blunt at such a moment.

The next thing out of his mouth was, "Your nose isn't too big. It's too pointy."

Well, thank you for clearing that up.

Not long ago, I was out with a guy friend I think can be pretty amusing when he's not wallowing in distaste for the human race.

He's made flattering remarks on occasion, although I'm not sure I'd call this one a compliment.

"Is it (pointing to my body) as well-preserved naked as it is in clothes?"

I'll give him points for a left-handed compliment, but it's still a pretty unusual way to score points...or is it?

I'd be honestly bothered if someone said I was stupid or bad company or dull. Opinions about my outside are just that: opinions and everyone is entitled to one.

I once dated a guy who said he didn't compliment me because it would make my head swell.

Fortunately for me, there are plenty of guys out there to make sure that doesn't happen.

And it can be pretty amusing even while it's keeping me in check.


  1. Your title just about says it all. We do sometimes say the damndest things, and I've made some dunderheaded remarks in my day for certain, but this is bewildering. It's kind of a survey question: Would rather be recognized as being what's considered universally physically attractive -- or interesting?

  2. I'll be the first to jump on your survey, HEK. Hands down, I would prefer to be recognized as interesting. If I'm interesting enough, you're eventually going to find me physically attractive.
    Anyone else?

  3. Most women of substance would say they'd rather be thought of as interesting. I agree with Karen that if you have a personality, then you become attractive. Pretty fades, personality is forever. Pretty people learn to get by on their looks, so they don't have to be as interesting.

  4. And look at how often you see an attractive woman with a so-so looking or dumpy guy. You have to assume the guy has a great personality since clearly she's not with him for his looks.

  5. Whatever? Let's face it. Looks matter. I don't care how interesting someone is if they don't care enough about themselves to wash their hair and put on some clean clothes, then there are most likely a number of things about them that I don't care to find out.

    I wouldn't comment on the shape of someone's ass anymore than I would comment on the hideousness of the boil on their forehead. In most cases they probably had little to do with obtaining either of them.

    And, just for the record, Karen, I never said your nose was TOO pointy. What I said was "'s KINDA pointy, but I wouldn't call it big."

  6. YOU didn't say it was too pointy, but my neighbor did!