You Won't Bore Him, Honey

After a walk down Leigh Street, past the bustle of Sunday morning doughnut-seekers converging on Sugar Shack and a pussy willow covered in fuzzy little buds, I made it to the Bowtie for a movie, but no mimosa.

And I have to say, I may be late to the party but now I understand why "All About Eve" was nominated for a record-breaking fourteen Oscars.

I don't know about anybody else, but I found so many facets to the story that fascinated me - the challenges of aging gracefully, the machinations of the theater world, older woman dating younger man.

Then there were the usual period details that I always enjoy - talk of girdles and women with size five feet, neither of which applies to anyone on the planet anymore, I don't think.

But really, it was the dialog that made the movie...and I'm not even talking about, "Fasten your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy night."

I'm talking about aging cracks like, "I'll admit I may have seen better days, but I'm still not to be had for the price of a cocktail, like a salted peanut."

Or, "My native habitat is the theater. In it, I toil not, neither do I spin. I am a critic and commentator. I am essential to the theater."

And it's hard to top a bald statement like, "She loves me like a father. Plus she's loaded."

Or the best line from the character named Karen, played by Celeste Holm. "The cynicism you refer to I acquired the day I discovered I was different from little boys."

But on the off chance you've never seen "All About Eve," it can be summed up in one classic 1950 quote by Bette Davis' character, Margo.

"Funny business, a woman's career, the things you drop on your way up the ladder so you can move faster. You forget you'll need them again when you get back to being a woman. That's one career all females have in common, whether we like it or not: being a woman. Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted. And in the last analysis, nothing's any good unless you can look up just before dinner or turn around in bed and there he is. Without that, you're not a woman."

Now I know. Without a man, I'm nothing more than a salted peanut.