Saturday, February 13, 2010

Bruising the Moneymaker

Murphy's Law of snow, at least as it applies to me, is exactly what you'd expect.

I went for my usual four-mile walk down Grace Street yesterday, still having to navigate around mounds of crusty snow and ice.

For the first time in ages, though, there were long stretches of cleared sidewalk, but still interrupted by ice and snow piles.

No doubt as a result, there were more of my regulars out and about.

About to step off the curb over an enormous pile of icy snow, a car started honking furiously at me just as I crested the mound.

I jumped visibly, and almost lost my footing, but didn't; it was Pedro, one of my favorite waiters, who claims to see me everywhere, but never says hello.

Finally, he had.

Further up Grace, and trying to negotiate an icy patch, I hear my name shouted from across the street.

I slide a little, but don't fall, as I look up to see who it is and answer back.

When I run into him last night at Ipanema, he asks if it was that morning he had seen me.

Perhaps if I'd actually taken a dive, I'd have been more memorable.

And then there was the Crooner, the guy on the bike who always sings to me.

Only this time, he approached me from behind, singing "Hey, there, lonely girl" and almost running me off the sidewalk.

He's got to find a new theme song for me; I'm anything but lonely.

But maybe that's the only song he knows.

The point here is that despite a still-treacherous walk yesterday, I remained upright.

So why then when out walking the dog less than a block from home, did my equilibrium desert me?

The beagle was answering nature's call and in an instant, I was headed to the ground.

Somehow I managed to both twist my ankle and land on my knee.

I could feel the ice dig into my kneecap as I landed.

One frickin' block from home.

And while this probably wouldn't be a problem for most females (a girl told me last night that she has her "winter coat" on, not having shaved her legs since before Thanksgiving. TMI) at this time of year, for me it is.

I awoke to a small cut and large pink bruise forming on my knee this morning. I could wear pants to hide it, except I don't wear pants.

I could wear a skirt or dress to cover my knees, except I don't own any that long.

Looks like I'll have to resort to using opaque tights for camouflage for a while,which unfortunately eliminates some of my most fetching ones...and just before Valentine's Day, too.

Such a shame.

But isn't that how Murphy's law works?

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