Ha! Hot Dog Heaven

I should have been suspicious when I got the e-mail this morning:

I have an errand I need to do in the West End. Would you consider having lunch with me there at one of my favorite places?

I should have been suspicious when I met him at his office and was gifted with a beautiful pair of leather driving gloves that fit like, well, a glove. (Full disclosure: He'd ordered them for himself, they were way too small so he'd returned them; the vendor said they'd been "crinkled" in transit and wouldn't accept them so he'd had to order himself another pair) He immediately thought of me because doesn't everyone with a ten-year old Altima need driving gloves? Even so, the timing...

The point is that this is an old friend, one who knows me very well and would never ask me to the West End unless he had a good reason...or a sense of humor and he had both.

So off we went to run his errand which amounted to dropping off a flat tire at Costco's tire center to be fixed. He then pulled out from in front of the automotive department and into a parking space.

Rummaging through his toll money, he pulled out three dollar coins and a quarter. "Hungry?" he grinned. "Cheapest, best lunch in town."

But I got the last laugh. First, he presumed that it was my first trip to Costco, but a girlfriend had already given me my one and only Costco experience. Second, I love a good hot dog, so I wasn't the least bit disappointed at the prospect of a Hebrew National for lunch.

I must exude the air of a person who doesn't dig dogs. Not so. Just this summer while at the beach, I'd spotted Hebrew Nationals on a bar menu, but when I went to order one, the kitchen was closed. The friend who was with me that night was dumbfounded. "You like hot dogs?"

The next day the same friend went to the store to get HBs for lunch. I enjoyed two dogs with mustard, relish and onions while sitting on the porch swing staring at the ocean and thought nothing more of it.

Months later when the subject of hot dogs came up at a party, my friend was quick to tell our group, "You should see how fast Karen can eat two hot dogs!" I hadn't realized my eating speed had been noted or even that my speed was out of the ordinary. Doesn't everyone devour their dogs?

As I did today after loading it up with mustard, onions and sauerkraut. I was especially enamored of the onion dispenser's crank mechanism, allowing me the satisfaction of chopping my onions in a unique-to-me manner. I'm a big fan of the new experience, not to mention a fan of lunch for two with drinks for $3.15.

And, yes, I finished my hot dog long before my manly friend did. The joke was on him.